I'm a pain in the neck!

So I had this little surgery on my neck to fix a herniated disk that has limited my abilities for a few weeks now. The most important is that I can't lift over 20 pounds, meaning I can't lift Javy. I've been living with this issue for almost two years now. You can refer back to my previous post "Heavy" for more info. I don't really want to talk abut my issues now, Lord only knows I have plenty.

I want to address why it was necessary to do this now. Because it was now or never. I have to prepare for the next phase of Javy's life- being an awkward gangly teenager. For me that means making my back stronger, well, my whole body stronger. So a short time of suffering, that has been eased with the help of a great many friends, is worth it in the long run. 

As I type this, I just realized that may be the answer to another questionI've been asked a lot, lately. How come you've been able to be successful now, losing so much weight. I kind of scratch my head at this one, too. I've had 39 years of failure, why now?  The motivation, seemingly came out of nowhere without too much pain. I don't believe it's a motivation of fear- fear of turning forty and missing out on the rest of my life. Fear never works as a motivator, at least for me. But life has always had a way of working out for us, with everything falling into place when necessary with very little effort coming from me. (My ancestors must've been really good for me to be so blessed). Maybe that's all it is, everything just working out, making way for the next phase of our life. Hours wasted worrying for nothing, because its all under control. 

Inevitable Valentine's Day Post

I know all single people hate this day, but I have a hard time hating a holiday that's all about love.  Being the almost insanely obsessed person that I am about positivity, I think it's an awesome time to teach kids about sharing love and kindness. So I did the mommy thing last night and made homemade double chocolate chunk cookies and made them into Valentine's for Javy's class.  I did this for a variety of reasons. First there's the social aspect. Javy will look cool to his friends and its a way for him to express friendship. But in reality, the kids know Javy didn't make them.  Javy may not be able to express love verbally but he does it in other ways. I know the kids feel that. More importantly to me, it's a way for me to show my love to kids who are my son's friends.

My Funny Valentine

Notice he looks up for grandma

Hey Ho! Let's Go!

About a year ago, at the youthful age of 38, I stepped on a scale.  The digital read-out blinked out the numbers "263".  Today, at the youthful age of 39, the digital read-out of the same scale, blinked out the numbers "186".  I accomplished my goal for the holidays and made it through without gaining weight (I lost three pounds, but I gained them back) but my net weight at Thanksgiving maintained until the new year.  My waist is under 30 inches and I went from a G cup to a DD.

Now it's time to kick some ass and knock the rest out, until I reach my goal of 155.    Piece of cake, because I know it works.  It's basic science, if you eat a certain amount of calories and stay active, the excess fat has to come off.  It cannot defy science, fat is not that smart.  It doesn't even have a brain.

So here's a little January pep talk:  Get started!!!!  WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?

The obvious benefit is that you will feel so much better.  I have endless amounts of energy.  I've become one of those people that I used get annoyed with.  I never stop moving.  I come home after working an eight hour shift (and I have very physical job), I clean, go to the beach, bake bread and cookies and workout.    It's ironic that my hobby is baking, but that's another story.

And there are so many unforeseen benefits that I never thought of (slapping my forehead with my open palm) :

1.  A purse strap actually stays on my shoulder.
2.  I can find cool clothes my size at the thrift stores.
3.  I don't have to pay over $50 for a bra that fits.
4.  I don't even have to buy clothes because my sister's fit me now (Hee Hee)!
5.  I pay less for food because smaller portions actually fill me up.
6.  I can put on my socks standing on one leg.



Alright, I've sat here long enough, writing this.  Gotta get moving now!

Why did you lose 80 pounds?

Because I want to be able to do things like this:

Two Years of Surfing

I made this movie for my son's teacher because she's never seen Javy surf. Javy has now been surfing for two years.  The music is "Free" by Donavon Frankenreiter with Jack Johnson.  

A Couple of Movie Recommendations!

     First, I just want to recommend the documentary, "The Horse Boy" to everyone, whether you know a person with disabilities or not.  Even if you don't know someone, there's a great chance that you will meet a person with disabilities and this movie gives a neat perspective from the vantage point of the parents.  Its actually about a boy with autism, but I can totally relate with his parents.

     One of the points that it brings up is the fact that autism is becoming more and more common and we need to find a place for everyone in our society.  I love that.  No more hiding them away in an institution.  We should embrace their differences and see their value.  And I have proof that everyone, no matter their abilities, has a place in society.

  

     The picture above is a card that Javy's class made for him for his birthday.  The teacher gave them the heart cut outs and told them to write whatever they wanted for Javy.  These kids are physically able,  but have other issues that cause them to be in a Special Education classroom.  Javy's teacher explained to me that the student who wrote that Javy taught him how to smile, literally never smiled but he lights up with Javy.  Another student wouldn't write their letters, but when asked to write for Javy, began writing.  I like to think that maybe because they met Javy, these kids will overcome their adversities and be able to follow their dreams.  Javy can't walk or talk, like most people, but he does have a way of inspiring people.  

     The other movie I want to recommend is "Step into Liquid".  This movie explained something to me that I had no way of understanding, why surfers are the way they are.  It made me realize why Javy lights up when he is surfing.  It doesn't matter that he can't do it by himself or stand up by himself, just the whole experience has him stoked.  

     Originally, I said that I wanted to lose weight and be healthy so that I could surf with Javy.  I realize now that is not really my dream and Javy doesn't really need me there.  He's got the bug, with or without me.  That is pretty cool.  

     Javy still has taught me how to surf, though, metaphorically speaking. I've overcome a lot of my fears and learned to ride whatever comes my way. 

 "I'm not afraid to die.  I'm not afraid to live."- U2

Perspective....

A thought occurred to me.  I have a lost 77 pounds, so far, since last January.  Javy is about 75 pounds, therefore, I have lost one Javy-sized person.  Just to put this in perspective, here is a photo montage:

This is me plus one Javy

This is me plus two Javies!

This is me plus one Javy!