2013, The Best Year, Ever!

2013, The Best Year, Ever!  That was the  title of another news article I saw.  I liked it, so I took it on. Sincerely, I think that 2013 actually was the best year, ever.  It wasn't necessarily an easy year, nor did we win the lottery, nor did I marry any millionaires.  Or divorce any millionaires, for that matter.  I ain't got time for that.  This year, just had that certain kind of magic.  I've never felt stronger or more alive.  Javy is always doing new things and continues to amaze us.  Just last Saturday, I took him to Salt Pond and he held himself up, by holding on to the reef, horizontally in the water.  He did this totally independent from me, like he was doggy paddling.  I tried to get mom's attention to take photos, but she was watching whales, or something.  I am very grateful for a very good year, but I don't believe that it's going to stop just because it magically turns into 2014.  In fact, I'm even more excited to see what the future holds, because I believe that it will be that much more amazing.

As is tradition around this time of the year, I have compiled some of the highlights of this year.  I hope you enjoy it.  I've got to give some credits, first.  Most of the photos are mine, but the hiking photos are Aaron Emayo's and the really cool one of Javy in front of Diamond Head is Chris Grumble's.  And the surf photos are from photographers who I don't even know, but were out there when Javy and Kevin were surfing.  I owe them a huge mahalo.  They gave me a gift to see the joy on Javy's face that I can't see from the beach.  (One day, maybe I'll paddle out there myself.  But I don't want to become a rescue mission and take all the fun from Javy.)  As is, also, my tradition, I carefully chose the music that embodies the experience.  I really wanted to do Eddie Vedder's "Better Days", again.  I love that song.  It totally just says, what I just said.  "The future is paved with better days."  But I love Neil Young, too, and I always wanted to use "Heart of Gold".  I think I've found it, on so many levels.  So here you go.......

We have a no return policy!

So what do you get the kid who is 12 years old, but plays like a four year old?  Another cheap plastic toy from China?  Truth is, I find it very difficult to shop for Javy.  Let me rephrase that, it's difficult to find that one thing that is going to make Christmas magical, like a bicycle or a Barbie Dream House or a Red Ryder BB gun with a compass in the stock and this thing which tells time.  It just doesn't exist at any box store for Javy.  So we made our own magic.  The first one is a sensory board, flat piece of wood that bolted all kinds of different shapes, textures and colors; enticing to touch and see.

Javy's sensory board

Javy's surf wall

Sensory overload.  He's thinking what should I grab next?

Then the other one is more like a tower, that we attached all kinds of different toys.  This one is for the living room and is a little bit more mobile.  

The tower of sensory overload

They seem to be great hits.  As a mom, its awesome to be able to have him stand or sit up and work with him on various functions, all at once.  And the toys don't end up on the floor, where he has to wait for someone to come pick them up for him.  

Actually, the favorite thing for the holidays ended up being our water table, a shallow plastic bin that I filled with water and cups.  Our new Christmas Eve tradition is going to be sitting outside with the water table and homemade sangria (not for Javy, of course).  The only problem is that there's no good place to put your sangria.  Maybe this will be an every evening that we can tradition.

Busy and captivated

No place to run!

No place to hide!

Just accept!

Chillaxin ain't easy!

It's Sunday!  Every now and then, it's okay to rest the bones. I mean, it was a hard week. The week started with just me and Javy, against the world. On top of that, I worked all week with a sore throat and a cough, got glutenened and now my mom is sick. Javy partied like a rock star last night and stayed up until 9:30. Today seemed to be the right time to put a blanket on the floor and watch Netflix.

However, Javy has yet to be convinced that a body really needs that much rest.

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Tonight, Javy got to walk in the Waimea Town Christmas Parade.  It was so much fun, I got to push his wheelchair.  He was so happy the whole time and did not get over stimulated by all the noises and lights.  We've actually skipped the last two Christmas parades.  The last time he went to one, he screamed the whole time.  The loud noises were just too much for him, despite the fact that he was with two of his favorite people-Ryan and Aaron.  So when we got the chance to walk in it, I had to do it.  Maybe he doesn't like watching them, but being in the middle of one just might be his thing.  And such an awesome thing to be right in the middle of, all his peers.

Here's some of the photos that I got.  I know you guys who are my Facebook friends have already seen all of these, but oh well.  Merry Christmas.

I look groovy in my red faux turtleneck!

Looks like an angel, but he's got some devil in him, too.

Classmates since first grade.  Can't believe that he's taller than me now.

So sweet!

Javy being backed up by the band.   

Patiently waiting!

Another classmate since first grade.  

Javy's perspective of the parade.

Pau!  Time to grind.  At our Irish Marie's house,
wish our Alabama Marie was here, too.

Resting, while mommy drinks wine.
He's wearing my flannel  shirt and it almost fits. 

To infinity and beyond.....

Three years ago....

October 30th, 2010, Javy's first time surfing

November 2013

Exciting to think, where we will be three years from today........

Happy Happy Birthday!

Today, at 11:30pm central standard time, Javy has been living it up on this earth for twelve years. His year has been really full:  Big wave surfing, surgery, a visit from his Alabama cousins and starting middle school.  The biggest changes have been gradual, those close to him may be the only ones who notice-his facial expressions, his body language.  His vocabulary has grown.  He says "mom" and I believe "nana" is his grandma.  He reaches to hold my hand or just reaches out for me and rubs my arm.  It seems to me that he doesn't just see me as the one who just takes care of him, but also looks to me for guidance and approval.  I do think that this is the first year that he actually understood that birthday is something special.  Every time someone said it to him, he just squealed with delight or looked at me, like "How did they know?"

I know, I know, you're saying just get on with the photo montage, because I know you have one.  And yes, I do.  These are more for my benefit, because I forget how far we've come and it's great to see how much he's grown and become a young man.  And I'm not even going to mention that there's seems to be darker hair on his upper lip.   Here you go, a slide show accompanied by Queen's "I want it all."

.  

Improv

Regarding my last post, "Ahead of the Game", I had promised some of my friends that I'd make sure to post some of the things that I actually did with the food, this weekend.  It's not even the weekend, yet.  But I've been at it since Wednesday night.  I want to post before, what's in my head, disappears into a time-space warp.

On top of that, I thought of a lot of useful tips for weight management while I was cooking.  I even wrote notes so I wouldn't forget.  I'm going to break it down in a few segments.

IMPROV
Zucchini, what can you do with zucchini.  You replace your pasta with zucchini.  Driving home from work Wednesday, the light bulb went off, "I'm going to make spaghetti out of zucchini."  I'm gluten intolerant, it's brilliant.  I made an alfredo sauce with some left over cream that was bought over the weekend (not an item we usually have in the fridge).  We had chicken leftover, that was used to make the broth for the dressing.  I added some mushrooms, onion and garlic.  I'm being vague, I pretty much just put the sauce together on the fly.  I think I got a little confused, because I added lemon juice, too.  I think that's for scampi, but, whatever, it tasted good. The important thing to know is that I peeled and shredded the zucchini.  I blanched it, but I think next time I'll steam it.  Ultimately, Javy's satisfaction is the true test and he loved it.

Chicken Alfredo

shredded zucchini

Successful Dinner!

Still, even after this wonder meal, my zucchini still runneth over.  Zucchini lasagna was the answer.  I'm not sure what the real definition of lasagna is, or if it really is Italian.  I suppose I could Google it, but I don't want to ruin the mystique.  I imagine it to be a very romantic term for layering stuff with damn good cheese.  I consider myself to be a fanatic of cheese and that will probably be the last thing to go before I become a vegan.  Baby steps, I say.  Like the chicken alfredo, this recipe was totally improvised.  I used the mushrooms as my meat.  I sliced the zucchini with a cheese slicer and added a little eggplant-just because it was there.  I had tons of fresh basil and a little bit of my homemade tomato sauce left over, too.  I just started layering all that with some mozzarella.  I bought some of those aluminum pans from Costco and made two pans.   I froze one pan and we ate the other one.  

alotta sliced zucchini

In true lasagna style, one pan is a little bit short.
Just wanted to make sure I had enough stuff.

Not as enthusiastic about this one, but he tolerated it.  There was cheese.

Tip #1: Here's the thing, eating pasta, or any grain, with a meat, is a complete calorie killer.  If you use an App, like Myfitnesspal, you'll see that your total daily calories disappear when you combine those two.  So replacing your grain with a vegetable is a good way to cut back on the caloric intake and it provides so many more nutrients.  See how I balanced out the rich chicken alfredo with something light.  And it works vice versa, don't eat meat if you want to enjoy some pasta or rice.  

A Tale of Two Stocks

Besides the lasagna on Thursday, I also worked on making two stocks-vegetable and turkey.  The turkey is for the gumbo that I made tonight.  I'll address that later.  The vegetable, just because I did have so much leftover basic veggies like carrots, celery and yes, I threw in some zucchini, stuff that was gonna go bad in a few days.  Vegetables stock is got to be the easiest thing in the world to make.  You pretty much just sautee' the veggies in some olive oil and add water, then simmer that for about an hour.  So easy, but will be the base for a lot of good things to come.  

The turkey stock was made with the turkey carcass.  Now it may be the Irish in me, but I love Thanksgiving because its the one time of the year that I can use the phrase turkey carcass without seeming like a freak.  The Chieftains use this term so melodically in their song, "St Stephen's Day Murders", "The carcass of the beast, left over from the feast, can still be found haunting the kitchen."  Ahhh, the Irish!  Okay, slight digression, thanks for hanging with me.  My recipe for the turkey stock can be found in the gumbo recipe I used from The Homesick Texan, which I will provide the link for in the next segment.   

And besides the two stocks, I made buckwheat pancakes, which I topped with the leftover homemade cranberry sauce.  They seemed to be pretty righteous.  Unfortunately, I was unable to partake since the buckwheat (not wheat, by the way) mix had wheat in it.  The cranberry sauce was super easy and delish!  It's from the Pioneer Woman's website.  thepioneerwoman.com

buckwheat pancakes with cranberry sauce

My gluten free breakfast-raw grapefruit and orange juice.
No Grey Goose, actually, I just pretend.

Yummy satisfaction!

Tip #2: Never underestimate your leftovers.  Before you dive into the fresh stuff, use what you got.  And don't be afraid to think about the future.  I froze 3 quart size bags of the vegetable stock.  After I used what I needed for my recipe, I still had 2 quart size bags of turkey stock that I froze.  Future heartaches have been averted.  

Making a roux, checking it twice

Turkey gumbo!  That's what it was all about, tonight.  I got this recipe from the Homesick Texan, who I am a big fan of.  Not because I am a homesick Texan, er no, but because I think she could be related.  She seems to understand the food culture from whence I sprouted.  She even has the recipe for King Ranch Chicken, which I actually believed for a very long time had been invented by my Aunt Dru.  But gumbo is not one of those things that I actually grew up with.  I'm from south Texas, not East Texas. But she posted it and I accepted the challenge.  Mostly,  because I had all the ingredients and I got to use my turkey CARCASS.  homesicktexan.com is her blog, check her out.  For me, it was delightful!  And I'm happy to say there will be plenty for me because I was the only one who thought so.  

Shunning the gumbo

Tolerating

No!

Javy got a bowl of rice and a hotdog, but he tried it, at least.  I am looking forward to tomorrow, so that I can eat some more.  It was very rich, so I only ate one small bowl.  

Tip #3:  Please don't underestimate yourselves.  I hope no one thinks that I am posting all this stuff to brag.  Like look at me, look at all I did.  I'm not like that.  I've worked really hard these last two days.  If you knew me before, you'd know how lazy I could be.  I was a work 40 hours a week, kind of gal, who only thought about the immediate future.  I don't know exactly when it clicked inside my head, but to have a successful healthy lifestyle, you got to utilize your time wisely and plan ahead, especially meals.  In addition to all this stuff, I caught up with all the yard work, got the Christmas tree out, performed various homemaking functions, and took care of admin stuff.  I used to be the great procrastinator, now I'm getting it done.  A very wise person told me recently, "You gotta make hay while the sun is shining."  So if you're like I used to be, just start with small changes and see where it goes from there.  Your quality of life will be so much better.

Ahead of the Game!

We had an awesome weekend.   It started out, of course, in Hanalei with a surf session with Javy's favorite surf partner, Kevin.  And a gourmet beach bbq with Debbie, Maia and Ryder.  Debbie is an awesome cook.  Then my sister and her girlfriend came over from the Big Island.  I feel very very blessed, because we now have a full cupboard and refrigerator.  They bought us two bags full of vegetables from the Big Island farmer's market, they are much cheaper.  I also feel ahead of the game because we already had our Thanksgiving bonanza, I think it was one of the best Thanksgiving meals I've ever had, personally. We also got a special treat- a night out on the town at Port Allen Bar and Grill, at sunset.

Javy living it up at dinner.  His Keanu Reeves hair is making a come back.

But irony is never too far away, my friends, as my body decided to detox itself on Monday morning and I came down with some kind of vicious stomach bug.  I didn't eat for over 36 hours and my first meal was a bowl of brown rice and lots of hot tea.  It's Tuesday evening, and I'm just now able to sit up.  So far no other family members have been afflicted, thank God.  For whatever reason my body needed it, but I really missed my kids at school and I won't get to see them until after the break now.

 So now I've got a long weekend to prepare all the vegetables that they brought over.  I really feel like a pioneer woman who's got to prepare the harvest for the winter months. I'm nervous, because I don't want to blow it.  I want to make sure everything is used as efficiently, as possible so that Javy and grandma can have plenty of healthy meals.  So now that I can sit up, it's time to do some research.  After having such an awesome gourmet beach barbecue, mostly with vegetarian dishes, I'd really like to learn to cook like that.  I mean, I'm from the south.  We do meat and the vegetables come with meat, too.  I've got a lot to learn.  Anyone have any suggestions, message me.  Have a good holiday, my friends.

It's Never Too Late....

I was thinking that I love that life took the good and the bad parts of me and made one awesome meld, that is me.  I don't know if it took me this long to figure that out, or took this long for me to take shape.  I think its latter and I owe it all to Javy.  Pre-Javy, I was young and obnoxious.  Most of you guys wouldn't have given me the time of day.  Javy brings out the best in me.  I'm glad that I can finally say that I'm proud of myself.  

I am determined that I will reach my first goal weight of 155, the last 20 pounds that have haunted me for the past couple of months.  I am so determined that I know that I will even lose weight over the holidays.  This is huge for me.  Last year, my goal was just to make it through the holidays without gaining weight, which I was successful, by the way.  For me, this is more than a physical development.  It tells me that I'm gaining strength inwardly, as well.  The holidays are more than food.  They are more than physical indulgences.

We are actually having our Thanksgiving meal, this Sunday, because my sister and her girlfriend are flying over for the weekend.  I am so excited to share with them a meal that is made from scratch.  I've already pureed the pumpkin that I found at our local farmer's market.  I made homemade cranberry sauce.  I think that I've even convinced them not to have a turkey.  I'm not sure about that one, but I refuse to buy a Butterball with all the nasty stuff they inject into it.  So we'll see how that goes.  We're going to visit a local farm to get fresh herbs and vegetables, maybe even get some goat milk.  It's just going to be an awesome time of sharing and reminiscing.  I'm sure we'll bring my grandma's memories back to life as we cook her cornbread dressing, with a non-wheat twist.  And of course, our Aunt Dru's memory will be kept alive with some some fresh breakfast screw driver's, can't make Thanksgiving dinner without them.  

Home is where you make it!

I was just prepping everything for the week-planning meals and schedules, when I caught myself saying, "See! I would've made someone a good homemaker."  Don't worry, I self corrected and then stated, "Oh wait!  I did!  Home is where you make it."

As promised, I made a video of Javy's escapades.  But I made it more like a documentary, or momumentary.  Yeah, I made my own word up, take that spell check.  I call it a weekend, but really it was only one day, with the exception of Friday's clip of Hanalei.  Saturday ended up being a lazy on the couch, watching movies day.  Javy has been having restless, sleepless nights, lately.  And he had a fever Friday night.  It may have to do with his dysphagia, since it's only happening at night.  He could've gotten something in his lungs or it may be acid reflux, too.  I'm going to have him check out by the doctor next week.  But without further ado, I give you, "A Weekend in Javyland."  Just a warning, though.  It is fourteen minutes long and Javy doesn't have to wear clothes on the weekends, just his briefs.  

Apparently, Keanu Reeves hair isn't very persuasive.....

Because this happened this week, after my letter to the Mayor of Kauai.  http://www.nytimes.com/2013/11/01/business/bill-limiting-pesticide-use-on-hawaii-island-is-vetoed.html?_r=1&

It's was a sad day, but the counsel can override the veto with five votes.  Hopefully, there will be no funny business before they can bring it to vote.  We can still make a difference with our money and our votes next election day.  I haven't been very fond of Mayor Carvalho, anyway, since he doesn't want anyone driving or parking on the beaches.

It happened on Halloween Day, but we didn't let it kill our spirit.  We still went out and collected our GMO candies, lol.  I made a promise to myself not to not buy it, I can't keep other people from buying it.  But really, we just got to educate, educate, educate.  People don't really know what's inside most of the things they buy.  Halloween is more of a social event for us since Javy can't eat most candies, anyways.  It's a good way to walk around and get to know neighbors.

My letter to the Mayor of Kauai

I e-mailed the Mayor of Kauai, tonight and this is what I put:

Dear Mayor Carvalho, 

Please sign Bill 2491.  I have attached a picture of my son, Javy.  He has special needs.  He loves living on Kauai.  He's a big wave surfer, you know.  We live in Hanapepe Heights and he attends Waimea Canyon Middle School.  As his mother, I have to make decisions the best I can to protect his health and safety-the food that he eats, his medicines, the fabrics that his clothes are made of, etc.  But I cannot protect him from what goes on in the fields just to the west of our house, nor can I protect him from the what goes on in the fields just outside of his school.  Only you can do that.  The counsel has already done their jobs, please do yours and help protect my son and the people of Kauai.  

Sincerely,

Doris Williams 

PO Box 688

Hanapepe, HI  96716

And then I attached these two pictures:  

This one because I thought Javy's Keanu Reeves hair can persuade anyone and also, behind him is west where the GMO fields are.

This one, because who couldn't be swayed by Javy surfing.

For those who aren't aware, Kauai is having a huge community debate, right now.  We have Bio-Ag corporations on our island, on the west side- Syngenta, Dow Ag and Pioneer.  They are experimenting with GMO crops and they spray pesticides, at a higher concentration than what is allowed, 7 days a week.  Our county counsel actually passed a watered down bill that would hold these corporations accountable for what they are doing to our small island.  My understanding is that it would create a buffer zone between homes, schools, and roads.  It would make them disclose what they are spraying in their fields and then they would have to do an environmental impact statement before they could continue doing their "research".  If you want to read more about it, here's a link to a Huffington Post article.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/16/kauai-gmo-hearing_n_4108914.html

Admittedly, when all of this started, I was on the fence about GMO's.  I believe in science, God created science.  Scientists are always banging their heads, trying to come up with better ways of doing things.  But I never agreed with how these corporations treat the surrounding communities.  I know people who are personally affected by what goes on in these fields-they are constantly sick with respiratory infections.  Here's a link to a video that was actually made by people who live on the west side of Kauai.  http://westsideeyes.tumblr.com/?og=1  Plus, who can deny the fact that west of Kaumakani looks like a wasteland now, especially with all the dust storms.  Wouldn't it be better if they actually grew crops that we could actually eat.  I love the farmer's markets but geez, they can be pricey.  

But then, I also started researching about GMO's themselves.  It's not good from what I can see.  They're not actually producing anything that's beneficial to society.  They say that they can make more food to feed the world's growing population, that's more nutritious.  But they're not, there is very little output by these corporations and there's been very little study done about how they effect communities such as ours.  Most GMO's can be found in processed foods, especially those with corn syrups, beet sugar, and soy.  I think my next step will be to start a letter writing campaign to the companies that sell foods with GMO.  I think we can effectively protest with our votes and our money.  I'm going to start with some of the companies on this link.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/maria-rodale/celebrate-nongmo-month-8-_b_4069900.html  These companies have nonGMO products but the company as a whole, has products with GMO.  

I want to do something.  I haven't been able to attend any of the events, but I want to do something.  I can support my friends, but its hard for me to get away, to actually be a physical presence at counsel meetings.  The one I was going to attend, didn't happen because our van is overheating and I needed to take care of it.  Plus, you pretty much have to camp overnight to even get into the tiny counsel room.  Well, this was kind of an impromptu blog, but it comes from the heart.  Goodnight!

We made it through the first month

It's almost been 30 days since I said goodbye to my last career.  More importantly, it has been over a month since we'd been to Costco.  I mentioned in my last blog that we had to streamline our lives, quite a bit.  I'd say we've been fairly successful, despite a few rough patches.  We set a goal for our total budget for our groceries with only one trip to Costco a month.  This being the first month, we estimated how much meat we would need to last us the month and that was the majority of our purchase on that trip.

I then made a 30 day meal plan.  At first, this challenge gave me a rash for a few days.  How the heck do you plan 30 days of meals.  Thank God, I finally realized that I was completely over thinking this and I found a simpler way to think about it.  I divided up the days of the week with general meals, according to our schedule.  So our weeks went something like this: Sunday-chicken dinner (cause its easy to throw a whole chicken in the crock pot and then there's some broth to use for other recipes later in the week), Monday-Steak w/ a fresh vegetable, Tuesday-Comfort Food, Wednesday-Seafood, Thursday-Experimental Ethnic Food, Friday-Stew, chili or soup (that way we'd have left over to eat on Saturday when we'd be playing), Saturday-Grill night.  So I take these general themes and then just plan a more specific menu on a weekly basis.

The surprising part to me was the vegetables.  I planned on going to farmer's markets and then planning my recipes for the week.  But it was difficult to make it to the farmer's markets a couple of times because of my schedule.  So I had to go to Big Save.  Sadly, vegetables and fruits are kind of pricey and that took a huge chunk out of the budget.  We're looking into signing up with a farmer's co-op, where you pay a flat rate and you get a box of fresh stuff, whatever they have in season.  It would end up being much cheaper.

The awesome thing was that we grossly overestimated our meat supply.  The freezer is loaded up about half way, still.

But then about a week ago, I started watching the movie, "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead", while I rode the stationary bike. I'm not advocating a juice diet and I think there's more to get out of this movie than that.  It really made me think hard about our consumption of meat and proteins.  We really eat a lot of food and we're not hunter's and gatherers, anymore.  We don't need that much meat in our diets, it doesn't have to be in every meal.  And guess what, this saves us money.

So again, we went to Costco, our one big monthly trip to Costco.  We bought no meat.  We bought vegetables and nuts.  I bought stuff that I could stretch into bigger things, like Javy's snacks-organic sugar and coconut oil and organic chocolate chips.  Carrots and Sweet Potatoes, I can make stews that I can freeze and make them last a long time.  Because we didn't have to buy meat, we splurged on organic, cage-free eggs.  We'll see how this month goes, I love having a stocked kitchen.

I do recommend the movie, though, it was really inspirational and the main guy, Joe Cross is really handsome.  A lot of people still want to know how I lost all my weight and I still get compliments.  I kind of clam up, because I really don't like all the attention.  But from this movie, I see how he inspired one person and then that one person ended up inspiring many more people.  I see how I need to be more vocal.  And my message is, just start moving, even if its only 2 minutes.  Just keep pushing yourself more.  The confidence you gain will make you want to do more, even change your eating habits because you'll want to keep feeling good.

And on another happy note-we've noticed great progress in Javy, lately.  He's been moving himself across the floor, twisting and moving his body, like its nothing, and trying to verbalize more.  I'm going to work on getting some video of him for a future post.  I want everyone to see what he can do.  I have nothing to back this up, but I can't help but think that it may be because he doesn't eat processed foods, anymore.  It's been a few months since I've bought him anything that was loaded with preservatives and food coloring.  And that was exactly the reason that I did start making his snacks and limiting processed foods-to see if it would help his brain function better.  Hmmmm, could be.

If I had a trillion, kazillion dollars.....

I would build a big wheelchair accessible playground on the side of my house, just like Kamalani bridge.  It would be custom made for Javy with original artwork, plenty of sensory areas and at the end there would be a water feature to play in.  But on the very top there would be an adults only, cocktail bar for stargazing and early morning coffee drinking, sunrise watching.   

I would send my mom to MIT to get her engineering degree, since that is what she should be doing.  Then I would send her on a cruise around the world with Tom Selleck and David Caruso.

I would build a helicopter pad on top of our house and get my helicopter pilot's license so that I could fly just over the mountain and Javy could go surfing anytime he wanted.  Things like schedules would never get in the way of such an important thing.

Hoku Foods, Ishihara and Sueoka's would be the only grocery stores that we would shop at.

We would eat at Wrangler's every Friday night.

We would travel the world, on Virgin Airlines, and hike around all kinds of cool places because I would buy Javy one of those fancy off-roading strollers for big kids.

Who needs a trillion, kazillion dollars?  This could all come true even without it.

And Now For Something Completely Different........

Now on to the topic that's been stewing in my head for a few weeks now, before it boils down to nothing and another year's gone by.  After 16.5 years, I have resigned from my old employer and moved on to something, well, completely different.  I haven't really been able to talk about it much, just to people who were close to me.  But my next venture has been on my mind for quite some time.  I wanted to reach 20 years, just because....  It's 20 years, a good round number, whereas 16.5 sounds a little broken (and I really only missed the half year mark by 7 days.), like I gave up, or something.  My last day was on September 30, I thought that was appropriate, especially with a pending government shutdown (ahem).  Anyway, I digress.  I didn't exactly give up, life just kind of kicked me in the buttocks, and then lined itself up for me.  Really!  Sometimes failures are good things because they point you in the right direction of what you do want.  

Enough with the philosophizing, you might be saying.  I knew what I wanted, I just didn't know how to go about taking the next step towards it.  I wanted to be an occupational therapist.  At first, I thought I wanted to be a physical therapist, somebody who could help Javy walk.  But somebody told me one day that I needed to be a life coach.  And I was like, really that's an occupational therapist, they help with life skills and rehabilitating people to perform at their highest level.  I want to do that.  Occupational therapists don't necessarily work in an office, they can go where they are needed.  Flexibility, just what I need, especially when Javy is older and a young adult.  

So now, I went from being a steadily employed civil servant (third generation, I might add) to a Home Health Aide, going to school to be a Certified Nursing Assistant and a Classroom Aide for Headstart.  It makes perfect sense,right?  Not really, no one was more surprised than me to know that would be my next path.  Trust me, it's going to work and I really enjoy both my jobs.  I get to hang out with my two most favorite people-the little ones and the old ones.  And I'm really learning a lot about Javy in between.  In a couple of years, I'm going to apply for the Kinesiology Program at the University of Hawaii and I'll have the right background to get in.  Oh, and I'm off when Javy is out of school because Headstart follows the public school calendar.  

I guess, I'll be blogging a little more about frugality, because we're streamlining our life, a pretty good bit.  I haven't felt this free since I learned how to ride a bike.  

I trust that its all going to work out because since I've been Javy's Mama, things always do.  I gave up my dream to be an FBI Agent because being a mom was more important.  I did get to work at one of my dream jobs for a few years, but the satisfaction of that never quite overcame the desire to do the best for Javy.  That desire brought us to Kauai.  I will never regret anything in my past or say, "Should've, Could've, Would've."  I had so many great experiences and made some great friends working at the airport.  Javy may never have become a big wave surfer, if I hadn't been working at the airport. 

Dream on, my friends, dream on....

My First Attempt at Recipe Writing

Okay, I made something this am and I just have to share.  It came from my own head, but it was inspired by a former co-worker of mine.  Some of y'all may have heard me mention the Pancake Omelet that I made one day in an effort to make a gluten free pancake while conserving the all too expensive rice flour.  This was much better.  My co-worker suggested that you can also take peanut butter, eggs and bananas and make pancakes.  I'm trying to be grain free that means no rice, corn or wheat, pretty much just whole foods.  And I wanted something besides eggs and sausage (which I make homemade).  This is what I came up with and it has to be my favorite things now.

First, I mixed two eggs and about 2 Tablespoons of Coconut oil together really well.  Then I add some unrefined coconut sugar and a dash of vanilla, mixed all of that really well.  I added about 2 Tablespoons of peanut butter.  I used the all natural kind from Costco, the one with just peanuts, no sugar, no added crappy stuff, the one my mom hates.  I even added about a handful of chocolate chips, the organic ones from Costco.  I heated up my skillet and slicked it up with some coconut oil, cooked the batter like regular pancakes.  I was so happy that it actually worked and I couldn't even tell that it had no kind of flour.  I topped it with organic honey and a pat of butter.  It fueled me up for my morning walk with the dogs and believe me, you need a lot of energy when you take a short legged dog and long legged dog for a walk, together.

Deep Thoughts with Jack Handey...

Yet again, this is not the topic that I have been mulling over in my head.  But its prominence has pushed the other topic out of the way...  For now....  

It has dawned on me why I have been stuck with my weight loss, teetering between 174 and 178, since July.  It occurred to me in an early morning epiphany.  It jolted me from a dead sleep, even.  It has nothing to do with my diet or exercise, actually.  I forgot to keep accepting myself.  I've become impatient and focused too much on my dress size instead of my wholeness.  I've even found myself feeling "fat".   

I had to remind myself that the first thing that I did when I got my motivation to change my lifestyle was to accept myself in all my glory of 263 pounds.  The pressure immediately left me.  I was already awesome, I just made small steps to be more awesome.  I was beautiful at 263 pounds, I'm still beautiful at 176 (that's what I was this morning).  I will continue to make steps in the right direction towards my total wholeness.  

As proof of my growth, my friend even took a picture of ME that I actually like.

I love how dorky I am!  :)

The Early Bird Special

A couple of weeks ago, Javy's teacher asked about why Javy seems to have a hard time swallowing and gets choked up.  She asked if he'd ever had a doctor say that he needed to be on a special diet.  I kind of shrugged it off, because this had been a concern of ours when he was younger.  His speech therapist at the time had recommended that he have a swallow test.  That's when they take an X-Ray of his throat while he's swallowing some food.  His speech therapist and pediatrician were present and they said everything looked fine, he swallows normal.  We accommodated his tendency to swallow food whole by just making sure that his food was cut really small so he wouldn't choke.  Life went on.

Until his teacher brought it up, again.  Because I live a drama free life and am open to all possibilities, I accepted that the teacher's concerns might be valid and this issue may need to be readdressed.  In other words, I didn't freak out.  I told the teacher that the person to talk to about this would be a speech language pathologist and I know an excellent one.  But the teacher said that she'd just bring it up with the school's new speech therapist, who I had yet to meet.

A couple of days later, Javy's crack team of educational professionals and his home team, met up for his annual IEP meeting.  It was there that we met his new speech therapist and I like her.  She was right on this whole swallow thing.  She seemed to be geeking out on it and I love it when specialists geek out about my son's conditions.  In my experience that usually means that they're going to follow through until they solve the problem.  And then I usually get to geek out on it, too.  Staying up all night, Googling stuff.  It's a vicious cycle.

Anyway, she explained that the way Javy's mouth is shaped, he has a hard time manipulating the food with his tongue so the food gets swallowed before its chewed properly.  At this time, the light bulb went off in my head!  Ta Da!  It's because his palate is small.  That's been one of the observations made by the geneticists since Javy has been seeing a geneticist-narrow palate.  I asked the speech therapists if its possible that as Javy has grown, it's just gotten worse, creating this new concern.  I had noticed it, but I contributed it to Javy laughing uncontrollably and getting silly when I was trying to feed him.  It was a point of frustration for me.

The ST agreed to do an evaluation on him, but in the mean time she gave me a few things to think about.  Feed him softer foods at night, because its probably very tiring for him.  (I had never thought that eating could be tiring, but it made sense)  And also eating dinner earlier.  I have no problems with this because I grew up at grandparent's house and grandma sometimes had dinner on the table as early as 4:30pm.

Yesterday, I actually got a house call from the ST, because she lives down the street from us and that's just how we roll in Hawaii.  (Awesome!)  She gave me a name for Javy's swallowing disorder-dysphagia.  I've been trying to geek out on it but I feel like I have ADD right now.  (I got glutened the other night, handling dog food of all things.)  I'm impressed that I'm even able to write this, I tried last night, but couldn't get it to flow.  There's a lot of stuff about dysphagia, and I need to wait for the ST's report to figure out what's best for Javy.

It's just another reminder that we can never get too comfortable in Javyland.  We'll see you at the buffet.  

Grace!

I just want to follow up a little bit on my last post, "I'm in his World Now."  I, actually, have a couple of other topics brewing in my head that I was going to sit and write about, but this came to the forefront of my mind.  And since I don't like to think too much about what I write about, I'm just going to go with the flow and let me heart do the typing.  But just expect a great influx of blog posts in the near future, because there are changes happening in Javyland, even right now.

I'm very excited about all the possibilities that are going to occur and also, what I will learn from them. One of the lessons that I've learned just over the last week, is that I've got a lot to learn.  Hey, its the first step.  This week, I've learned a lot about Javy through the eyes of an older person.  I'm not talking about their 60's or 70's but a person approaching the century mark.  Like Javy, their body or their mind doesn't function 100%.  But they still deserve respect.  Their bodies and their minds are still their own and we have to give them the time and space to do what they need or want to do.

So I'm coming to terms with exactly what my role is in Javy's life.  Yes, I'm Javy's parent.  Most parents get to train their child in the way they should go and then send them off to a life of their own.  That's not how its going to be for us.  I think it would be a very boring life for both of us, if I just tried to fit Javy into my boring life of work and whatever I consider to be fun.  I've decided to follow his life and what he considers to be fun and important.  I honestly believe that's why I was put on this earth.  Hopefully, from our experiences, I will be able to educate and bring that world to other people's understanding so that we can all give and receive a little grace. Ahhhhh, such great relief, I finally have a vocation.